Life · Uncategorized

The secret to happiness..

We all want to be happy in life, don’t we? We want deeper relationships, better health, more in life and increased productivity.

What if you were told how to gain all of it? What if you were told to do one thing to be happy in life?

The key to productivity and to gain more in life is…. gratitude. 

It’s a term that is used often by many but, tends to be misunderstood or not used in the right context.

Gratitude-ɡratɪtjuːd, is an emotion expressing appreciation for what others have done for you and being thankful. And no, being thankful does not mean you are weak; gratitude and weakness are incomparable. Psychologists have found that being grateful is more than being thankful, it is a much deeper appreciation of something or someone, which produces a much longer lasting positive effect on a person.

group of happy young people jumping on the mountain

We are very much focused upon what others have and looking at the small piece which is missing from us that we completely forget we are “rich”.  And no, I am not talking about wealth/money, there is more to life than having thousands of cash stacked away, you can be rich of needs. We completely forget about all the things we have and what God has blessed us with. Do you ever stop and think about all you have?

I know with me, I would see all I have and yet look at what the person next to me has and would want that. It would blind me of all I had, so much so that I would completely forget I had anything. For example, I wanted a family who were supportive and parents who would tell me “its okay” and would support my decisions; I did crave that mother-daughter relationship that I would see other girls had. What I did not see is that those other girls did not have a father or, they had a father but, had no relationship with him. I did not see how they much they wanted to have that father figure. I did not see that I had both parents who I was living with- all I saw was the mother-daughter relationship I was missing.

Thinking like that only increased my sadness and feelings of being inadequate.

Expressing gratitude is not easy when going through a difficulty.  In actual fact, this is when it can increase your happiness- when you not only express gratitude when things are going well but when things are challenging.

maxresdefault.jpgA couple of years ago, I made a disclosure, one which was extremely difficult and personal. Being an introvert and not telling people abut myself, the disclosure was terrifying and challenging.

During this ornerous ordeal, I was very grateful for my friends and tutors for their support and encouragement. At first, I despised them for it, I was annoyed and upset at what they made me do, at how they destroyed  my family relations. Looking back now, disclosing was not a bad thing, it was a good thing- it was when my journey to heal started; it was when I discovered the power of gratitude. 

As time went on I began to focus on the things I was grateful for, which removed me from dwelling on all my worries and anxieties.

Not only did expressing gratitude remove me from all my worries,  it actually has strengthened my relationship with family, friends and even strangers!

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Melody Beattie

The benefits of showing gratitude is enormous both for your personal development and others. I would like to share two important benefits:

  1. makes us happier: it allows us to appreciate what we have even though it may not be great or even beneficial to us. It removes us from all harmful toxic emotions and allows us to experience good feelings.
  2. increases our self-esteem: being grateful removes us from comparing ourselves with others, it allows us to look at what we have and be thankful. It humbles us and reminds us to be thankful and remember that someone else may wish for what you have, and vice-versa. Also, it allows us to appreciate other peoples accomplishment.

Stay beautiful and always be bold hide less. 

A x

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