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Who are you?

Do you ever ask yourself this, and wonder, who you are?

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I mean, you may respond  to this question by saying either your name, ethnicity, place of birth or even a characteristic. I myself, would say I am a student, lives in London and loves to help……but it really depends on the context the question is asked in.

Unfortunately, not everyone would know how to answer this question when they ask themselves. It could be for a number of reasons and for myself, the difficulty in answering this question “Who are you?” is it is quite “invasive”. I am not too sure if that is the correct term to use but, it summarises how I feel. What I mean by invasive is that the questions requires you to be open about yourself, to yourself.  You are also, telling others about yourself; which in a way acts as a window and allows them to either come in or walk away.

It has taken me a very long time to start to feel confident and comfortable in my skin; the more I was becoming true to myself and not worrying about what others think of me, the more I was beginning to appreciate and accept myself.  Don’t get me wrong, I am not where I want to be yet but, I have started the process and that is the most important thing; you need to acknowledge and understand what you need to do to move forward. You can write bullet points or make notes somewhere of what you need to do.

I believe that people can feel your sincerity, strength and confidence. I honestly believe that people will respect you once they know you respect yourself. If they see that you are proud, not ashamed and carry yourself well, they will respect that. Although they may not like you, they will will find it quite difficult to disrespect you, once they see how you stand. I have been told many times by people that I look confident. In all honestly, I would not say I am confident but, I act confident- theres a difference there. I do not like people walking all over me, so I ensure that my voice is heard, and no, that does not mean shouting; if not, I behave in a sophisticated manner and show confidence in the role I am in, whether that be a sales assistant or medical profession.  This can only be done when you fully understand your role.

It is very important to identify and be mindful of your strengths and weaknesses. This is not only for personal growth but, for the safety and growth of your businesses/profession. Regardless of whatever field of work you are in,  it is extremely important to be able to identify your strengths and not just your flaws. For a long time now I have not been able to state my strengths or even identify what I was good at, as I felt I was not good enough. Yet, I was extremely quick to list my weaknesses. For a long time the list would only increase; it would prevent me from feeling anything positive towards myself; this included loving myself- a feeling which I feared to feel and show, due to traumatic experiences that involved being taken advantage of. To overcome this,  I had to become selfish and shameless and look at what was best for me that will assist me to move forward.

“Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability, but comes through continuous struggle. And so we must straighten our backs and work for our freedom. A man can’t ride you unless your back is bent.” Martin Luther King Jr

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Be confident in who you are and what you believe in. Trust yourself and believe in yourself!  For if you don’t, then who will?

Not knowing who I was actually allowed me to start searching for answers; it gave me an opportunity to start learning about myself and begin growing.  Although, I feared growth and change, I feared not knowing, I knew I had to take the first steps towards it otherwise I would never know. The thought of not knowing, would only hinder me and just increase the anxiety levels.  We should not let our fears stop us from growing as a person.

Be Bold and Be Brave!

Ax

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